Family MediationSandra Lee2020-04-27T17:51:54-04:00
When there is a present crisis in the family or between two or more family members needing REAL solutions to REAL problems
– FAMILY MEDIATION may be your best process for resolution!
What is Family Mediation?
Family mediation applies the basic principles of mediation to resolve the issues that arise in a family system. Using the skills and techniques of the mediation process issues are identified, and sound decision-making is possible, reconciliation of divergent views, clearing the air, lessening resentment, which all paves the path to greater understanding, improved communication, and transformation of relationships.
It uses the same framework and skills as used in any mediation process.
What will Family Mediation help us with:
Family Mediation will help you resolve conflict creatively and respectively and build your family or relationship mindfully, intentionally and learn to thrive during times of transition and change. The mediator will facilitate the process and promote discussion and negotiation that allows people involved in a conflict the opportunity to exchange views, ask questions, discuss difficult topics and find solutions. You will learn skills for:
Communicating more effectively
Resolving conflict more appropriately
Listening in order to honestly hear what the other person is communicating verbally and non-verbally
Realizing conflict is a part of life amongst people and in families and it can be effectively dealt with without losing relationships
Empowering individuals in the family or in the relationship to manage their roles in a healthy and stabilized way
Overview of the Family Mediation Process
Family mediators are neutral, trained professionals who help family members with beneficial discussion and guides everyone through considering possible solutions and options to address various problems through brainstorming, experience, and attentive listening by the mediator. The mediator will:
Identify the issues and objectives
Ask clarifying questions, listen to each members perspective and position
Brainstorm about creative options that may be viable for resolution
Realistic solutions are proposed to find mutually acceptable solutions
Map out the plan of resolution
Separate the people from the problem
Commitment from each family member to apply the necessary effort to help themselves and the other member(s) work toward mutually determined goals and objectives
What Family Mediation is NOT:
It is not marital counseling, psychotherapy, or legal representation.
Who offers Family Mediation?
Family mediation is best done by trained and experienced mediators in the area of mediation. The process used to conflict and disputes among disputants.
Types of issues relevant for Family Mediation?
Divorced parents dealing with teenage issues and parenting from 2 homes
Revisit agreements and arrangements made in the past that are no longer serving the family dynamics well (i.e., a parent plan schedule where children rotate every 3 days and it would better serve the children to move to an alternating rotation but 1 parent opposes the revision)
Extended family member and the dynamics (i.e., grandparents who remain close to former spouses and it is now creating issues in your new marriage)
Grandparents and ex-spouses rebuilding a functioning ex-in-law relationship for the best interest of the children
Family Mediation Story
“A couple recently married. They were very much in love and looking forward to building a bright future with lots of joy and memories since there family was now doubling in size. Mom had 2 children and dad had 3 children. The old favorite sitcom – The Brady Bunch – was coming to real life.
All seemed as though it would just run smoothly since the couple had gone to remarriage counseling with their pastor, had involved the kids in the marriage ceremony and bought a house big enough for everyone.
What the couple didn’t count on was the fact the kids did not fall in-love with their new step-parent and their children. Soon friction started brewing. There was jealousy over the fact 2 of the kids lived in the home full-time and the other 3 lived with their mom full-time and visited alternating weekends. The 2 full-timers resented having to do all the house chores and the other 3 would just pop in for fun. Of course the 2 full-timers told their mother and she agreed so she went to her new husband and explained the injustice. The new husband, aka dad, didn’t take well to this discussion and began vehemently defending his 3 kids who have to share their dad and feel like outsiders.
No need to go any further with the story. You already see the need for some intervention quick. Family mediation is different than therapy in that it isn’t looking at the past, personality disorders, diagnosis, assessments… The Family Mediator can’t fix any family member or family relations but they can use their highly trained skills and abilities in conflict resolution to help this family get back on track.”
“Thank you for working with me, Jessica and Colin. Divorce has been so hard on us all. I have felt a great sense of peace and calm about the whole situation. Having a plan for how we will communicate in our home and to function as single-parent family is empowering.”
“Sandra worked with us through our divorce process 6 years ago and worried about how our son was coping. We have returned to her over the years as co-parents. She just helped us arrange to take our son (who is still struggling so much) to a camp for teens. She has been so committed to our family over the years.”
~Joe & Amy
“My ex-wife and I had been divorced for several years when we started having communication issues again when are sons reached teenagers. A friend recommended Sandra and so glad they did. She helped us figure out what our issues were and then think about how we could resolve them without going back in our history and throwing old wounds at one another. We even came up with a new schedule for spending time with the boys in the process.”